Navigating the world of dating can be like sailing in uncharted waters.
Sometimes, it’s hard to differentiate between someone who simply knows what they want and someone who is high-maintenance.
Being high maintenance isn’t about having standards; it’s about having demands that go overboard. Trust me, no one wants to spend their time constantly trying to meet unrealistic expectations.
In this article, we’re going to explore seven things a woman might demand on a date that could indicate she’s really high-maintenance. If these demands ring a bell, you might be better off single.
Keep reading, because these insights could save you a lot of time and heartache.
1) Excessive expectations
It’s not uncommon for people to have certain expectations when they go on a date.
But there’s a line between having standards and having demands that are too high.
When a woman starts to demand things that seem excessive or unreasonable, it’s a clear sign that she might be high-maintenance. This could range from expecting you to reserve at the most expensive restaurant in town, to insisting on a specific brand of champagne, or even having a set dress code for you to follow.
Sure, everyone has preferences and there’s nothing wrong with that. But when those preferences elevate to the level of specific demands, it may be time to reconsider the relationship.
If you find yourself in a situation where your date’s expectations feel more like an audition than a casual meet-up, remember this: Relationships should be about balance and mutual respect – not one person jumping through hoops for the other.
2) Non-negotiable schedules
I remember going on a date once where everything had to happen at a specific time.
We were having dinner at an upmarket restaurant and she insisted that the food should arrive exactly 30 minutes after we’d ordered. If it didn’t, she’d make a fuss. The same went for the timing of the movie we were supposed to watch after dinner. It all had to fit into her precise schedule.
Flexibility was not part of her vocabulary, and it made the date feel more like a military operation than a relaxing evening out.
Yes, it’s important to be punctual and respect other people’s time. But there’s a difference between being organised and being rigidly inflexible.
The beauty of dating is in its spontaneity, its unpredictability. When everything has to happen according to one person’s schedule, it takes away from the fun and can indicate that you’re dealing with someone who’s high-maintenance.
3) Constant need for attention
When it comes to dating, a little bit of attention goes a long way. But there’s a difference between enjoying someone’s company and needing their constant attention.
Here’s an interesting bit of information. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that people who constantly seek attention and validation from others tend to have lower self-esteem.
So if your date demands your undivided attention throughout the evening, disregarding your own needs or interests, it could be an indicator of a high-maintenance personality.
Remember, a healthy relationship thrives on mutual respect and understanding, not on one person monopolizing the other’s time and energy.
4) Overemphasis on appearances
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look good on a date. After all, first impressions are important. But when the focus on appearances becomes excessive, it might signal a high-maintenance personality.
If your date is overly concerned about how she looks, to the point of obsession, or if she expects you to present yourself in a specific way that aligns with her standards, it could be a red flag.
For instance, if she gets upset over a minor wardrobe malfunction or criticizes your outfit choice, it may indicate that she places too much importance on superficial things.
Remember, while it’s important to make an effort in your appearance, it’s equally important to be comfortable and true to yourself. After all, authenticity is the key to any successful relationship.
5) Lack of gratitude
I recall a time when I spent weeks planning a special date for someone. I made sure everything was perfect, from the restaurant reservation to her favorite flowers. But instead of appreciating my efforts, she complained about the table we were seated at and how her meal wasn’t exactly to her liking.
It was disheartening, to say the least. It made me realize that when someone lacks gratitude and fails to appreciate the efforts you put into making them happy, it’s a clear sign of being high-maintenance.
Remember, in any relationship, showing appreciation and gratitude towards your partner is fundamental. It not only acknowledges their efforts but also fosters a sense of respect and mutual understanding.
6) Frequent criticism
Constructive criticism is healthy in a relationship, as it can lead to growth and improvement. But if your date frequently criticizes you over trivial matters, it can be a sign of a high-maintenance personality.
This could range from commenting on how you hold your fork, to the way you speak or even the type of music you listen to. Constant nitpicking can be exhausting and leave you feeling belittled or inadequate.
Remember, everyone has their own quirks and habits. It’s important to embrace each other’s differences rather than trying to mold someone into an idealized version of what you want them to be.
7) Inability to compromise
At the heart of any successful relationship is the ability to compromise. It’s about finding a middle ground that both parties can agree upon. But if your date is unwilling to compromise on even the smallest things, it’s a strong indication of a high-maintenance personality.
Whether it’s deciding on a movie to watch or picking a restaurant for dinner, if she insists on having her way all the time, it shows a lack of consideration for your choices and preferences.
Remember, a relationship is a two-way street. It requires give and take from both sides. If one person is always calling the shots, it can lead to an imbalance that might be difficult to sustain in the long run.
Final thoughts: It’s about balance
Ultimately, dating is about finding a balance. It’s about understanding each other’s needs, respecting boundaries, and compromising.
It’s important to remember that everyone has their own quirks and preferences. What might seem high-maintenance to one person could be normal to another.
However, when demands become excessive, it can strain the relationship and create an unhealthy dynamic.
So if you find yourself constantly trying to meet someone’s unrealistic expectations, it may be a sign that they’re high-maintenance. And it can be worth asking yourself if this is the kind of relationship you want to be in.
On the flip side, if you see these signs in yourself, it might be a good opportunity for self-reflection and growth.
After all, we’re all works in progress. And recognizing our own tendencies is an important step towards becoming better versions of ourselves.
As the renowned psychoanalyst Carl Jung once said, “The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely.” And perhaps that acceptance is where true balance lies – not in meeting someone else’s demands, but in understanding and accepting our own.