By 
There’s a significant difference between being in a healthy relationship and being taken for granted.
This disparity often boils down to effort. If you’re the one putting in all the work while she’s just reaping the benefits, it’s not fair, and it’s not right.
Being in a relationship means sharing responsibilities, compromises, and sometimes sacrifices. But when it turns into a one-way street, it might be time to ask yourself: Is she taking advantage of me?
Detecting this can be tricky, and that’s why I’ve put together 8 signs that might suggest you’re trying way too hard to keep your relationship afloat.
1) You’re always the giver
The core foundation of any relationship lies in the balance of give and take.
When you’re in a healthy relationship, both parties are putting in an equal amount of effort and love. The balance may shift from time to time, but it should never be one-sided for too long.
If you find yourself constantly giving – time, resources, love, attention – and getting little to nothing in return, you’re likely trying way too hard.
And if your partner is comfortable with this arrangement, it might be a sign that she’s taking advantage of your generosity.
Remember, reciprocity is key in relationships. If it’s always you doing the heavy lifting, it might be time to reevaluate things.
2) You’re always the planner
In my own experience, I found that I was always the one making plans and initiating dates. It felt like if I didn’t suggest something, we would just end up doing nothing.
At first, I thought she just wasn’t the planning type. But then I realized that she was perfectly capable of planning outings with her friends or organizing her work tasks.
So why couldn’t she put in the same effort for our relationship?
That’s when it hit me. If your partner never takes initiative or shows interest in spending quality time with you, you might be trying way too hard.
A relationship is a two-way street. If you’re the only one making an effort to keep it exciting and enjoyable, it might be time to have an honest conversation with your partner.
3) Your self-esteem is suffering
In any relationship, your self-esteem should remain intact. Yet, studies show that people in one-sided relationships often experience a significant drop in their self-esteem.
If you’re constantly questioning your worth or doubting your contributions to the relationship, it’s a strong indication that something is off.
A thriving relationship should make you feel valued and appreciated, not inadequate or unimportant. So if you’re feeling down on yourself because of your relationship, it could be another sign you’re trying too hard.
4) You’re neglecting other aspects of your life
When you’re in a relationship, it’s easy to get caught up in the romance and excitement. But if you find that you’re constantly skipping out on friends, family, or hobbies to cater to your partner’s needs, it’s not a good sign.
A healthy relationship should fit into your life, not consume it. If you’re sacrificing parts of your identity or compromising your happiness for the sake of the relationship, it’s another red flag that you might be trying too hard.
Remember, maintaining your individuality is crucial even when you’re part of a couple. It’s essential for your personal growth and also for the health of your relationship.
5) You’re constantly walking on eggshells
Love should never make you feel anxious or afraid. Yet, if you’re always tiptoeing around your partner, afraid of upsetting them or triggering a negative reaction, it’s a clear sign something’s not right.
In a balanced relationship, there’s room for open communication and disagreement. You should feel safe to voice your opinions and feelings without the fear of backlash.
If instead, you’re always suppressing your emotions and bending over backward to keep the peace, it’s not fair to you. You deserve to be in a relationship where your feelings are valued and respected, where you don’t feel like you’re trying too hard just to maintain harmony.
6) You’re often left feeling drained
I remember a time when I felt exhausted at the end of each day, not from physical activity, but from the emotional toll my relationship was taking on me.
I was constantly trying to please her, to meet her expectations, and to keep the relationship afloat. But no matter what I did, it never seemed to be enough.
If you’re always feeling drained, physically and emotionally, due to your relationship, it’s a sign that you’re putting in more work than you should.
Love should energize you, not leave you feeling depleted. If it’s the latter, it’s time to reconsider if the relationship is worth the toll it’s taking on your wellbeing.
7) You’re always apologizing
Apologies are crucial in any relationship. We all mess up sometimes, and saying sorry is a part of making things right. But if you’re always the one apologizing, even when you’re not at fault, that’s a problem.
In a balanced relationship, both parties take responsibility for their actions and mistakes. If you find yourself constantly saying sorry just to avoid conflicts or make things better, it’s another sign that you’re working too hard in your relationship.
Remember, it takes two to make a relationship work. It shouldn’t be just you owning up to mistakes and trying to mend things all the time.
8) Your happiness is compromised
At the end of the day, your happiness is paramount. If you’re in a relationship that’s causing you more pain than joy, more tears than laughter, it’s a clear sign that something needs to change.
True love should make you feel cherished, respected, and happy. If instead, you’re feeling unappreciated and constantly unhappy, it’s a strong indicator that you’re trying way too hard to make things work.
Don’t compromise your happiness for a relationship that’s not reciprocating your efforts. You deserve better.
Final thoughts: Prioritize yourself
The essence of any relationship lies in mutual respect, understanding, and effort. It’s a beautiful dance where both partners contribute equally to the rhythm and harmony.
However, if you find yourself shouldering the weight of the entire relationship, it’s time for introspection. There’s a fine line between working on a relationship and losing yourself in the process.
Remember that your personal happiness and peace should never be compromised for the sake of a relationship. Love should make you feel empowered and cherished, not drained or neglected.
So, if these signs resonate with your experience, it might be time to reassess your situation. Take a step back, reflect on your feelings and needs, and prioritize your wellbeing.
Because at the end of the day, you are important. Your feelings matter. And you deserve a relationship that celebrates you, not one that takes advantage of you.
In the wise words of Buddha, “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” Let that sink in.