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You like a girl, but you’re not sure if she feels the same way? She’s not outright ignoring you but she is also not giving you clear signals she is interested?
Well, as harsh as it sounds, she may just not be into you.
Today, we get into some signs that this is the case.
..and how to handle it; if you play your cards right, you might, just might be able to turn it around.
Let’s dive in.
1. She talks to you about other guys
If she frequently discusses other guys she’s interested in or dating, it’s a clear sign that she sees you more as a friend or confidant rather than a romantic prospect.
Sharing her romantic interests with you suggests she’s not considering you in that way. Maybe the thought hadn’t crossed her mind.
What you can do about it
When she talks about guys she’s dating, particularly if she is complaining about them, it’s a great opportunity for you to playfully suggest you might be a good suitor for her e.g. “why can’t I find a good guy?” to which you can reply “You’ve got a great catch right in front of you but you haven’t seemed to notice”.
The key here is keeping it playful, flirty, and full of confidence.
She just might start looking at you in a new light.
2. She shows you raw emotion
When we say raw emotion we mean ugly crying, crazy angry, snorting while laughing.
And yes, these are often things you will see in a girl if you’ve been dating her for a few months.
However, when a girl is still trying to make a good impression, she will not let this side of herself out. So if she is showing her fully unreserved self, there is a good chance that she is not thinking of you in a romantic way.
What you can do about it
Showing raw emotion is a form of being vulnerable.
We are happy to be vulnerable in front of our friends but not usually in the dating stage with a romantic partner.
However, if she is showing you vulnerability, you can mirror that and show her a different side to you. This is not something guys often do, even to their friends, so letting her see this side of you may cause her to start considering you as a potential romantic partner.
Be careful, though, a little vulnerability is endearing, too much, and you are confirming your friendzone status.
3. She only invites you to group events
When she consistently invites you to group gatherings but doesn’t make an effort to have one-on-one time, it can suggest that she values your friendship but isn’t looking for a deeper connection.
She may not be comfortable or interested in more intimate settings with you because when girls find a great guy friend, they don’t want to mess it up by sending mixed signals. The best way to keep a guy friend is to avoid any confusion about how she feels about you.
Therefore keeping you to group invites only, could be a sign she is not that into you.
What you can do about it
Just because she doesn’t invite you to spend time one-on-one, you can investigate if there is a potential connection by suggesting things that mean it’ll just be the two of you.
The easiest way to do this is to simply tag a one-on-one event onto the group event.
For example, if she invites you to a weekend activity with friends, accept the invite. And suggest that you can drive the two of you, or drop her home afterwards. Increasing your one-on-one time may help her to see you as a potential romantic partner.
4. She declines one-on-one invites
If she frequently declines your one-on-one invitations or consistently brings other friends along when you try to spend time together, it’s a sign that she might not be interested in a romantic relationship.
What you can do about it
If you are already friendly and she is declining your invites to spend time alone together, there is a good chance that she thinks you like her, and she doesn’t want to hurt your feelings or ruin the friendship by giving you false hope.
This is a tricky situation, but all hope is not lost;we girls sometimes need help seeing what we really want.
At the same time, you don’t want to come across as too pushy.
Start including her in your group plans instead. If you get the green light there, you can start implementing the advice above, offering to drop everyone home, ensuring her house is last so you can get a few minutes to get to know each other.
5. She shuts down flirtatious banter
Lack of flirtatious banter or her quick dismissal of it can be a clear indication that she’s not looking for a romantic connection with you.
Again, this may be due to the fact that she does not want to mislead you into thinking she is interested.
What you can do about it
The best thing you can do in this situation is show that you are a happy-go-lucky guy who is up for a laugh.
Make sure the jokes and banter are not too crude or overly flirtatious, and allow her to see you acting the same way with others. This way, she will see that it is not just with her you act like this.
And a guy who can have a laugh is often a confident and desirable man in the eyes of us women.
6. She lets you see her at her worst (e.g., without makeup, hungover, sweaty etc.):
While being comfortable around someone is a positive sign, if she consistently lets you see her in her least glamorous moments without any attempt to impress, it may mean she doesn’t see you in a romantic light.
In romantic relationships, there’s often a desire to present the best version of oneself. If this is happening it is likely that she hasn’t even thought of you as a potential romantic partner.
However, that is not as big of an insult as you might think.
And there is a chance she could, with a few subtle changes from you.
What you can do about it
This is actually a level of comfort that you would hope to get to with a romantic partner, albeit a little after the initial dating stage.
It is always nice to know that a man is attracted to us in our natural state as opposed to when we are all dressed up with makeup. So take the opportunity to compliment her when she does seem attractive to you.
But again, be careful!
We all know that we do not look our best when we are hungover with mascara running down our face. So be sure to pick your moments when you are truly attracted to her.
7. She avoids physical contact or closeness
The absence of physical contact or closeness beyond a friendly hug can indicate that she’s not interested in taking the relationship to a more intimate level.
In romantic relationships, there’s usually a gradual progression of physical affection.
However, there is also a chance that she is shy or reserved and is waiting for you to make the first move.
What you can do about it
There is a chance that she is really not interested in you, and if that is the case, you will have to accept it with as much grace and dignity as you can.
However, if you are unsure and have had little physical contact with her, perhaps it is time to test the waters.
You could see if she reciprocates any physical closeness that you initiate.
Let me be very clear, I am not suggesting that you do anything that crosses a line with her physically; however, a hand on her shoulder or brushing a little closer to her whilst you sit next to each other or even just delaying that friendly hug a few seconds longer will be enough to show her you are initiating.
If she reciprocates, great. If not, you have your answer.
8. She blows you off for dates
If she frequently cancels plans with you at the last minute to go on dates with other people, it’s a strong indicator that she’s prioritizing other romantic interests over spending time with you.
If she is truly not interested in you, there is little that you can do; however, to confirm whether or not she has an interest in you, there is a bold move that you could make.
What you can do about it
This is risky and not for the faint-hearted.
However if she is canceling plans and blowing you off for other guys, it might be a good idea to suggest to her that you two go on a date. You can make a joke and say that ‘since you are always canceling plans at the last minute for dates, why don’t you and I plan a date, that way you will be committed to it for the evening”.
I admit you may face hard rejection with this but it could also work a treat and be the start of something special!
So there you have it, guys! These playful tips are your secret weapons to turn the tables and spark her interest in a fun and exciting way.
The bottom line
If she’s not into you romantically, that’s perfectly okay. Sometimes, great friendships can emerge from these situations.
And who knows, maybe she has a friend she can set you up with!
The key takeaway here is to be confident, embrace your unique charm, and keep the playful spirit alive.
There is a chance that you simply need to show that girl what a catch you are but don’t be desperate or overstep the line.
Remember, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Good luck!