10 ways to make your girlfriend realize your importance

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There’s probably nothing more exhilarating than finding someone who makes you feel loved and special. Because they’re important to you, you shower them with all the love and affection you can give.

But sometimes, many of us come to a point where we seem to get lost in translation with our partners, and we don’t know if we’re still on the same page.

We’re not sure if we’re just over the honeymoon stage or if she no longer feels the same way toward us. We feel taken for granted.

Maybe you want to rekindle the flame and make it go back to the way it used to by making them realize your importance.

Here are some ways to do this:

1) Limit Your Texts and Calls

The first step to making your girlfriend realize your importance is to make them stop and think if something’s up. You can do this by gradually changing your routine, like not calling or texting them as often as you used to.

She might’ve gotten used to these random acts of affection already, losing their meaning and novelty. That’s why she tends to overlook or take your efforts for granted, whether she means it or not.

Stopping yourself from calling or texting your girlfriend way too often might make them miss you.

After all, you can’t miss someone who’s always there, can you?

She would then start wondering how you are or what you’re up to. She’d also realize that your texts or calls were actually one of the highlights of their days.

2) Take a Backseat When Planning Your Dates and Activities

If you’re always the one planning out every detail of your dates and activities, it’s likely that your partner will appreciate these gestures and fall in love with you.

However, if you rely on these grand gestures too frequently, they may start to lose their charm. Just like constantly checking up on your partner, these actions can eventually be overlooked.

Last Valentine’s Day, I expected my girlfriend to surprise me as she usually does. However, I soon learned that she had not planned anything because she was preoccupied with finishing a task.

So, I decided to take charge and plan something at the last minute. It was much harder than I anticipated, and my girlfriend later revealed that she had been keeping herself busy because she thought I didn’t care about her activities.

3) Let Them Fix Things on Their Own

Are you always there for your girlfriend whenever she needs something? Do you feel like you’ve been doing it way too often, going out of your way just for her, and you feel taken for granted?

Maybe she also got too used to you helping or doing things for her, even if she can do those things on her own, like helping her wash her clothes or do the dishes.

If you think she’s taking you for granted, then maybe you can try stepping back a bit and letting her do things on her own. I know your partner is important to you, and you want to keep her as comfortable as possible.

But sometimes, being too present for them robs them of the opportunity to learn for themselves and be more independent, aside from getting too used to your help. If you’re still worried, you can still keep an eye on her, but withdraw lending a hand.

4) Stop Being Too Available

They say absence makes the heart go fonder, or you don’t really realize the things important to you until it’s too late.

Maybe your girlfriend got used to you being around too much because you’re always on call – you’re too available for them, and she knows you’d drop everything for them.

I know being there for your partner is a thing that couples normally do. But some people would get less attracted sometimes to people who don’t value themselves.

That’s why some would just call and ask favors without regard for your time and effort. It may be counterintuitive, but to make her realize your importance, you can try being less available and see how they’d respond.

5) Let Them Speak for Themselves in Tough Situations

You should take a few steps back, too, and let your girlfriend speak for themselves in tough situations.

If you’ve been defending them whenever people joke about or patronize your girlfriend, she’ll definitely notice when you stop doing it.

She may take these things for granted because as mentioned, it’s already become a routine. She’s gotten too complacent about you doing things for her.

When your friends start making jokes about your girlfriend during a get-together, you should let your girlfriend speak for herself, even if you have the urge to do so. I know it can be worrisome and uncomfortable to do this, but there are things she has to do by herself, too. If your girlfriend can speak for herself just fine, you can move on to the next point.

6) Hold Back on Giving Compliments

We end up having a relationship with our partners because of the attraction we feel. It usually starts as a simple crush until we grow to actually like and fall in love with them.

And if your love language is saying words of affirmation and complimenting your girlfriend, she might grow used to this, having your words lose value. Sometimes, it also becomes difficult for them to realize something’s wrong when they’re used to hearing nice things from you.

No, you won’t start saying mean things to your girlfriend from now on. You would simply hold back on giving them compliments and wait for how she’ll react.

If you’ve been showering her with flattering words, your girlfriend will surely notice if you suddenly stopped complimenting her.

They’d probably wonder if something’s wrong. I know it can be tricky to do this if it’s become your habit, so you might want to be more mindful.

7) Withdraw Affectionate Gestures

Like with holding back on giving compliments, you can also try withdrawing and showing your affection.

Like with the other points mentioned above, your girlfriend might overlook the way you care for them and how you’re affectionate towards them if you always do it, making it a routine.

She might no longer find these things special because it’s lost their novelty – she knows how much you love her and that you’re always there for her.

If you gradually limit showing care or affection, maybe she’ll realize your importance in her life and what she’s been ignoring for a long time.

This even includes saying “I love you” – you can try saying it less often than you used to. If she notices these changes, this will be a great opportunity for bringing back the novelty of showing them affection.

8) Give Them Space

Do you always spend your free time with your girlfriend? If she’s been taking you for granted, maybe you can start spending your free time doing things for yourself without them.

Maybe all you need is to have some quality time with yourselves. Your girlfriend may have grown accustomed to your presence because you’re always around.

Give your girlfriend some space and enjoy your free time for yourself. You can go out with your friends and spend time with them or build new hobbies.

There was a time when my girlfriend and I were away from each other for a long time. When we met again, I admitted that I really missed her. So maybe you just need some time away to rekindle the flame.

9) Focus on Yourself

We mentioned that some people tend to lose attraction to those who don’t value themselves – whether this applies to you or not, maybe you should also try to focus on yourself.

Maybe all you’ve been thinking about is the welfare of other people without putting yourself first. I don’t blame you at all because all of us tend to forget about ourselves sometimes when we’re deeply in love with others.

When you’ve given each other some space, take the time to think and look within yourself. Do the things you love the most, or have some quality time for yourself to relax.

You can also start doing things that will improve your relationship with yourself.

10) Have a Mature Conversation

Maybe your girlfriend isn’t really taking you for granted, or maybe both of you have unresolved problems.

The best way to make your girlfriend realize your importance is to have a mature conversation and tell her how you feel. Ensure being honest with your girlfriend while calming.

I know this isn’t easy and makes it feel like you’re begging for their attention or love, but what you’re asking for won’t be less important or valuable even if you have to say it.

You may also not know it, but your girlfriend might just have some personal problems, making her seem so preoccupied all the time. Even if your girlfriend really is taking you for granted because she no longer feels the same way, you should still talk about it to avoid hurting each other even more.

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