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It’s a harsh reality, but sometimes the person we love leaves us for someone else.
It’s a gut-wrenching feeling, one that can leave us questioning everything we thought we knew about the relationship.
But, as painful as it may be, it’s important to face the facts and understand that sometimes, a breakup is for the best.
In this article, we’ll dive into some common signs that your significant other may have left you for another guy.
It’s not going to be easy to read, but it’s a necessary step in the healing process.
So, buckle up and let’s get real about heartbreak.
1) They Don’t Spend As Much Time With You Anymore
This is fairly straightforward: why spend time with someone you’re not really into?
If you feel like the girl isn’t so much interested in hanging out with you anymore or the time you’ve spent together has drastically lessened, then it’s a good sign that someone else has entered the picture.
After all:
They may be using their newfound free time to spend with their new interest and leaving you behind.
It’s a tough pill to swallow, but it’s important to recognize that this behavior is a clear indication that they’re not invested in the relationship anymore
2) A Sudden Increase In Their Working Hours
Closely related to the first point is when they’re suddenly taking a lot of time at work: I’ve been guilty of this a few times, usually when the girl I’m interested in is my coworker.
The thing that makes this excuse so effective – and common – is that it can be perfectly harmless, and you get to indulge in spending time with the new guy while you’re at it.
If whoever you’re trying to date suddenly says that they need to spend more time in the office, they may have developed a liking for one of their coworkers or someone in the area.
Work is a perfectly reasonable excuse that most people don’t tend to question: but make any mistake, they’re definitely not just there for overtime.
3) Changes In The Way You Two Talk
Romantic interest (or any interest at all, really) can sometimes be pretty obvious.
There’s the flirtation, witty banter, and all the cute emojis you send to each other online.
But if she’s suddenly grown somewhat distant or the cute conversations have stopped, start entertaining the possibility that she’s already sending all those types of messages to another guy.
4) She’s Changed Her Appearance
In dating, there’s always going to be that urge to make yourself more attractive to the person that you’re interested in.
Sometimes, this manifests in changes to how you look.
Even for me as a man, I’ve personally started wearing specific things or styling my hair in certain ways if I really want to catch the eye of someone I like since I know it’s a way for us to start a conversation or get them to notice me.
To the guys: if the girl you’re seeing suddenly changes her fashion sense or her appearance in some way and is evasive as to the reason, you should start considering the possibility that she did it for another guy.
It’s even more obvious if she’s annoyed at you asking why – because after all, the changes weren’t made with you in mind.
5) You Feel Like She’s Stopped Paying Attention To You
While very few relationships are built on the foundation of always spending time with each other, the length of attention that you get from someone is usually a good indicator of how invested they still are in the relationship.
If a girl has left you for another guy, a good sign to look out for is whether she seems to still be paying attention to you or things that you’re interested in.
Even a lack of enthusiasm can be a telling sign.
6) Your Friends Or Family Haven’t Heard Much From Her Lately
If you’ve introduced her to your friends and family, they’ll inevitably start hanging out or at least interacting more – which makes it all the more obvious if they start avoiding them.
For me, there’s always a certain level of awkwardness if I continue to meet the friends and family of a girl I’m no longer interested in, so I usually start avoiding them the moment I know I’m going out with a new girl.
This isn’t because they don’t like the people in your life; it’s just that it’s difficult to discuss something like them being interested in someone else with a person that they only know because they were interested in someone close to them first.
If she starts showing a lack of interest in suddenly hanging out with you and the people in your life, she might already be making plans with the other guy.
7) She Spaces Out A Lot, Even When You’re Together
While I don’t like romantic cliches in film and TV, they do get some things right.
One of those is the tendency to space out when I’m thinking of someone else, even if I’m already with someone at the time.
Sometimes you can’t help it, especially if they really want to be with the other guy – and it’s a sign that you’ll definitely notice before long.
If she’s spacing out during your time together and doesn’t really tell you while it could be a sign that she’s thinking of someone else already.
8) “Hypothetical” Situations Become A Normal Topic Of Conversation
Thinking about “what ifs” is fun. They’re a good thought exercise and they can reveal stuff about the other person that you may have never known.
Generally, they’re nothing to worry about.
But if she starts bringing up hypothetical situations (usually involving another guy) all the time, then that’s her giving you a hint – or at least thinking about it.
Girls will often do this to kind of gauge the potential reaction that the guys will have to the idea of there being someone else, though the end goal of this line of questioning isn’t always clear.
These hypotheticals are usually used by women who have already made up their minds to pick the other guy, and the questions are really just them getting a better idea of how you’d take it.
9) There’s A Lot More Negativity
If you two have been fighting a lot lately, that can be a sign that she’s already discontented with your relationship and is looking at someone else.
Building up the negative energy can be their way of pushing you to break things off, especially if they don’t want to be the ones that do it.
In my experience, the reason why negativity goes up is that I’m already not invested in the relationship as much anymore – so why bother trying to be agreeable?
10) She’s A Lot More Attentive To Where You Are
It’s not really a bad thing to know where your significant other is, since it does help you make plans together.
But if she’s started to show extra attention to where you’ll be at all times, especially the times and places where you won’t be, that can be a sign that she’s making plans with another guy already.
In this case, showing interest in where you are isn’t out of concern for your welfare like it usually is, but it’s more an “all-clear” that she uses to plan her time with another guy.
Plus points if she’s really adamant that you stick to your schedule and never deviate from it: she’s really doing her best to not get caught.
11) You Don’t Plan Things As Often Anymore
Here’s one of the more subtle signs you can watch out for if you think there’s another guy: pay attention to how often and how far in the future you two make plans together.
If she’s suddenly become vaguer or is unavailable for activities, it could be that she’s leaving her time open for another guy.
I usually get vague with my planning if I’m not sure I’m interested in one girl anymore since I would prefer that my time be spent with someone else.
12) Gut Feeling Tells You There’s Someone Else
Science can quibble on how to exactly define it, but trusting your gut is definitely something that can give you a heads-up about an incoming situation.
This is especially crucial if you think that there’s another guy even if there are no signs. Sometimes, you just know.
In these situations, you’ll have to do a little detective work to follow up on your gut. Don’t just blindly trust it – it can be wrong sometimes.
If you decide to do a little digging, you might encounter any of the signs I’ve talked about so far, and you can start following the tracks from there.
13) She Tells You There’s Someone Else
Some women prefer the direct approach: if there’s another guy in the picture, they’ll tell you straight away.
Your reaction to this approach can differ. You might be thankful that she’s being honest, or this may come out of nowhere and hurt you, especially if things are really going well.
But no matter your reaction to this, it’s important that you take the message and move on. If she’s secure enough to tell you that there’s someone else, there’s very little you can do to change her mind.