A guy who loves you can be extremely possessive and territorial about you.
It’s usually his way of showing that he cares about you and doesn’t want to lose you.
However, he might cross certain lines by exerting his dominance over your life just to show others you’re taken.
So, what signs can help you observe if he’s marking his territory?
Some women find it endearing, while others may find it insulting to be regarded as “owned” by him.
Regardless of where you stand on the topic, it can be useful to pick up on the obvious signs of him being territorial so you can talk with him about it.
Here are nine prominent signs to look out for to determine if he’s territorial:
1. He’ll Make Elaborate Physical Contact in Public
A guy marking his territory around you may publicly make elaborate physical contact.
He might hold your hand when walking down the street, put his arm around you when other people approach, or never leave your side in a group.
By touching you in public, he wants the world to know that you’re taken.
Most of the time, he may not even be subtle about it and go out of his way to let your guy friends know that the two of you’re in a relationship.
He may get upset if he sees other guys trying to flirt with you or eyeball you, and he may intervene to “set the record” that he’s your boyfriend.
He may even cause you to lose certain social connections due to his overtly blatant attempts to intrude on your conversations by initiating intimate physical contact.
2. He May Insist on Taking a Lot of Photos Together on Your Phone
He might be marking his territory if he insists on taking an abnormal number of selfies together on your phone.
It could be as innocent as him wanting to use your phone to click the photo, or it could be his way of flooding your gallery with pics of you together so that you’re constantly reminded of him every time you take a photo.
He may also insist you post a photo of you two together on social media.
After all, he wants everyone to know that you’re taken and he is your boyfriend.
He may also take the liberty of using your phone to take a few selfies of himself to surprise you when you open your phone.
This might be his way of marking his territory by putting a smile on your face when you see his snaps.
If you feel this is an invasion of your privacy, you must tell him that it is not okay to use your phone without your permission.
3. He’ll Use Your Photo for His Background (And Even Show It Off)
A classic sign of him marking his territory over you might involve using a photo of yours as his background picture.
Having your face as his background will give him a feeling of the relationship being real.
Psychologically, he might be marking his territory as he feels that you’re his girlfriend, giving him a sense of control in the relationship.
He may even intentionally leave his phone open around other guys to let them know that you’re off-limits and he’s in a relationship with you.
It might be his way of showing you off to the world through his subtle day-to-day activities.
He may also use your photos to make him happy by reminding himself that he has a special person like you in his life.
4. He May Buy You Personalized Jewelry
He may buy you personalized jewelry if he wants to mark you as his territory.
When you wear the necklace or bracelet he bought, he might take it as a sign of your approval of the relationship.
For example, he might get you a necklace with the initials of the two you engraved to let anyone who sees you wear it know that you’re his girlfriend.
He may even get upset when you choose not to wear it, as he may take it as a sign of you not loving him.
If you know he’s possessive and territorial about you, you can make him blush by flaunting a ring he got for you, wearing a pendant he got from you in such a way that it’s noticeable, or by appreciating his gifts of jewelry by never letting him see you without it.
5. He Loves It When You Wear His Clothes
If he’s territorial about you, he will love it when you wear his clothes.
It will give him a sense of your belonging to him and help him cherish his special relationship with you on a whole new level.
It might even be a major turn-on for him when he gets to wear clothes that have your scent on them.
This may give him a sense of you always being by his side, and seeing you in his clothes will reassure him that you’re his girl.
Sharing is an important facet of the relationship, and sharing a wardrobe with him may make him feel stronger about the closeness of your bond.
When a guy wants to offer you his clothes, he’s saying he wants you to wear them and think about him.
Long-distance couples tend to do this as his garments will serve as a physical reminder of him.
6. He Will Make Grand Public Gestures to Show His Affection
A guy who wants to leave a stamp on the relationship and show you off to the world as his partner may make grand public gestures to show his affection for you.
He will come up with the craziest ideas to profess his love for you in front of an audience because he isn’t afraid to be vulnerable as long as you choose him as his partner.
While grand romantic gestures can be sweet and wholesome, doing them all the time at untimely moments may put you in awkward positions.
It’s also not a great sign if he’s only doing it for selfish motivations dissuading others from pursuing you. His love for you might be true, but his efforts may go in vain if he doesn’t have the right intentions.
7. He May Leave a Mark
This is perhaps the most obvious way of marking you as his territory.
Love bites may seem sweet on the surface, but it might be a toxic habit of his if he’s only doing it to let the world know that you “belong” to him.
He may want to leave a mark on you because he’s insecure about losing you but is also a passionate lover underneath his controlling tendencies.
There’s nothing wrong with proudly wearing a love bite as long as you approve of it.
But, you need to tell him that you don’t like visible marks of his affection if it’s bothering you.
He might be intimidated by your beauty and is afraid that other, higher-value men will be attracted to you. This is why he wants to leave a mark.
A great way to see if he’s giving them out of love or selfish interests is to check his reaction when you tell him you don’t want one.
If he cares more about marking you as his territory than your feelings, then it may be a red flag that needs to be addressed in the relationship.
8. He’ll Let People Know That You’re Together (Even if You Aren’t)
Another classic way he might mark his territory is by telling everyone in his and your social circle that the two of you’re dating.
He may go to great lengths to ensure that every human being in your vicinity is aware that you’re committed to him.
This habit can be sweet at first but quickly get on your nerves if it’s always coming in the way of your social life.
He might even be doing this because he is intimidated by other guys and is afraid that you will like them more than him.
He may even spread these rumors even if you aren’t dating him.
His possessive nature may cause him to misread situations by assuming platonic friends in your life have a love interest in you.
It’s also possible he’s telling other people because he genuinely loves you and doesn’t want to lose you.
The best way to tackle this if it’s something that’s bothering you is by having a heart-to-heart honest conversation about it with him.
9. He May Insist on Getting a Joint Pet or Moving in Together
Another way he might want to mark his territory is by insisting on a big step for the relationship. This might be getting a joint pet to raise as a couple or moving in together.
He may cherish spending time with you or like staying over because, in his mind, he feels that taking the relationship to the next level will make the world notice that the two of you’re serious about each other.
He may even subtly hint at this by deliberately leaving his belongings at your place.
It might be his watch, a couple of his clothes, or his favorite accessories.
In some ways, it might feel like you’re already living together when you’re dating a guy who wants to mark his territory.
You may even notice that he uses your belongings as his own because he equates you to belong to his life and may let others know by eating from your plate or coming over unannounced.
How To Deal With a Possessive Man: 6 Important Tips
Now if you want to make changes and you feel like your man is being a little too possessive, here are some tips to help you out.
If you’ve ever been in a relationship with a man, then you know how much they love to own things.
They like to think they own you, your time, your body, and your heart. It can be a little suffocating at times, but it is just something that comes with the territory when dating the male species of human beings.
It’s almost as if there is some primal fear driving them that another man will swoop in and take away whatever it is they so desperately want to hold on to — namely you.
As flattering as this may sound from a third party perspective, this possessive attitude can quickly become toxic once you get involved personally with such a person.
Read on and find out how to deal with a possessive man in your life…
1. Remember that you are an individual with your own needs, wants and desires.
You and your partner may love each other, but that doesn’t mean that you have to love every single thing about each other.
In fact, it is perfectly okay to have differing desires and ways of life.
Just because you want to learn how to salsa dance, doesn’t mean your significant other has to want to learn it with you.
And just because he wants to learn how to play the guitar, doesn’t mean you have to want to learn it with him.
Keep in mind that this man does not own you. You are an individual with your own wants and desires.
If you don’t have the freedom to pursue your own lives and do what makes you happy, then it’s not true love.
You don’t have to give up your individuality to be in a relationship, nor should you.
You just have to ensure that you are both on the same page regarding what you both expect from one another.
2. Establish and enforce boundaries.
There are probably plenty of instances where your guy friend might be crossing the line, but you don’t even realize it because you are too busy worrying what he thinks of you.
It just might be that he is smothering you to the point that you have no time to breathe or have a moment to yourself.
He might be getting so handsy with you that you feel uncomfortable.
And he might be making you feel guilty for wanting to spend time with your friends or family.
When you start dating a man, you should sit down with him and explain that you have certain boundaries.
It is up to you to let him know where the line is.
If he crosses that line, then you need to enforce that boundary.
It is perfectly okay to stand up for yourself and tell him that he has gone too far.
3. Don’t bend to his will.
You don’t need to be kowtowing to his every whim just because he wants you to.
You don’t need to bow down to his every request.
Some men get too comfortable in relationships and start acting as if they are entitled to certain things.
For example, he might start expecting you to run his errands, cook his meals, or give him baths.
If he expects you to bend to his will and do his bidding, then you should tell him no.
If he asks you to do something outside your normal behavior, then you should tell him no.
You don’t have to do everything he says, and you don’t have to do everything that he wants.
You’re an independent woman who deserves to live life with integrity and independence.
3. Talk to a trusted friend or family member about what is happening.
If you are feeling as if your boyfriend is smothering you or you feel as though he is being way too controlling, then it might be time to seek out some help.
Talk to your best friend about the situation or your family about what is happening.
Sometimes getting a fresh perspective can help you see things from a different angle and help you to realize that you are being too nice or that he is being too controlling.
Getting help from a friend or family member can also help you feel as though you aren’t alone in the situation.
Even if they don’t offer any advice, you can still count on them to be there for you and have your back.
4. Practice self care.
You have probably heard the phrase “take care of yourself first,” right?
Well, now is the time to put that into practice.
You need to make sure that you are taking care of yourself. This means getting enough sleep, eating well, and exercising regularly.
It also means that you shouldn’t skimp out on self care activities, such as reading a book, watching your favourite TV show, or going to the movies.
Doing things that make you happy and help you relax can help you get through a tough situation such as a controlling boyfriend.
If you are too stressed out and worried, you are not going to be able to handle your situation as easily.
5. Don’t give up hope!
With all the advice above, you may feel like you have to break up with your boyfriend.
But that shouldn’t be the case.
Yes, some guys take a while longer to get their act together, but there is still hope that he can change and become the guy you want him to be.
If you feel he is beginning to get too controlling or if he starts to exhibit signs of being overly jealous, then you need to take action.
You need to sit down with him and let him know that what he is doing is not appropriate behavior.
Hopefully, after talking with him he will be able to change his ways and become the boyfriend you deserve.